today for some reason I just had this feeling..
why do I and many others have so difficult to feel satisfied.
and now I mean in many ways.
I just felt like selling "all my possessions" [wich is not that much ha ha] and use what ever money I get to do something better with it.

I saw this tv-show today about this asian family that has somekind of desease that makes them gradualy blind, and they know that most of them will be blind, and many of them were already.
and on top of this they had some familyu members that were deaf and one was mute. so they actually had problems to communicate since the deaf/mute did sign language and the ones who were totally blind couldn see the signs, and if the blind talked the deaf of course couldn't hear.
but they were happy, and they lived life and un-selfishly helped each others.

it is strange, we are so spoiled and find problems in superficial things.
we have it so good, and still are far from satisfied.
you might be sad that your mobile is broken, but is that really importent?

 I guess we get numb, there is so much unjustice all over, we see so many things daily so it feels unreal or feels like "yeah well, that is how it is"..
but [if not Hindu or buddhist etc and believe totally in samsara - the wheel of rebirth] the truth is that we dont choose our family, we dont choose where we are born etc.
but many of us do have a choice, we kan decide to change our life, our way of thinking etc.
that has not got much to do with the actuall society we have around us.

 it is so hard, I can feel sad for people who have had less luck in where they were born or such things, at the same time I can somehow envy them for being many times happy with what they got, and the way they apprechiate basic things in life that we take for granted, or things we dont even react over.

 I just fell helpless and also sometimes feel ungrateful for at least not realizing the luck I have had, and that all my what ever problems is not importent.

but there are to many things so usually we think we cant do anything about this world, it has already gone to far so we give up and just keep on living our regilar life where we are quit greedy actually, not for us in a huge way but if compare to what others have we are truly greedy to for example having to go another coffe place because that brand has a slightly better flavour of their espresso ha ha.

   I dont know, today is one of thoose days where I just think to myself - what am I doing here? maybe I should e somewhere else doing something really importentn instead?

to be positive though, one major fact is that one of the major things for me being a yoga teacher is to know and to hear how yoga affects so many that comes to my classes.
that does in one way make me feel like I am in some way making something better for someone that probably needs it. instead of just offering something superstitious in a shop that to be honest you really dont need.

but we live in a world of consuming.

according to hinduism we live in kali yuga, wich is the last and worst of life periods,
a period when we degenerate and I think all will finally disolve or get destroyed so that then it can start over again on the first stage, wich most likely dont include human beings he he.